When You Got a Good Thing
by callmeRy
Summary: My second fic. Again, inspired by a song I heard this morning around... three I guess. Sleep deprived and tired. So sorry in advance and please don't mind the misspelling and wrong grammar. Enjoy. Hopefully. I don't own pitch perfect. Just a little bit idea that crossed my mind. Thanks for reading.


**My second fic. Enjoy. Hopefully.**

 **I own nothing. Not pitch perfect, nor the song. Just a little bit of idea. And sorry in advance for the misspelling and wrong grammar. English isn't my first language.**

 **And I will be gladly accept any critique and correction.**

 **Thanks for reading.**

* * *

I'm standing by the beach, staring at the ocean, feeling the waves wash over my feet.

It's sunset and it's so beautiful. And it makes me think of you. Well, everything makes me think of you. Still.

" _You are lucky, Beca."_

That's what people often said to me. For years I've been told that I am lucky. So many years that I'd need more than two hands to count it.

And I know that I'm lucky. I always have.

Yet sometimes, somehow, I forgot. I forgot how having you makes me the luckiest person in the whole universe. Sometimes I did. For so many fucking damn times. I did. Forget.

Because human are forgetful. Yes. We are.

Let me give an example. When we are crapping, I mean literally crapping, at first we'd notice how bad the smell is. Then in two minutes – _well more or less_ , the smell become less bad than before. It's not because it becomes less smelly. Our olfactory just got used to the smell. It's commonly called as neural adaptation.

That is how I- wait a second. Did I just compare you to a crap? To the smell of craps?

Ugh! _Idiot!_ I'm so bad at this.

Forget my example. My disgusting-unworthy-of-you example.

Now why did I compare you to the smell of craps again?

Oh. Being forgetful.

Okay. Now we can move on from the crapping part. Pretend the crapping part never crossed my mind.

 _Ehem..._

So... What I meant is that... sometimes when you have something for quite a long time, it's easy to forget how significant its presence. Until you lost it. Until it's gone. Or at least until you're threatened by its disappearance.

So now, I'm thinking of you. I want to think about you. About the most eventful night for me and you. The night when everything changed. The night I finally being reminded of how lucky I was for having you in my life.

Three years ago.

I scoff lightly. It's been three years, Chlo. But still, what happened that night is still engraved in the back of my mind. It never goes away. I never let it go away.

"We got a good thing, Becs!" You snapped at me that night after I stood you up for the umpteenth times, maybe the hundreds times on dinner. "But you ruined it!"

I knew about the first sentence. I knew that. I always have. But I didn't expect that it would be followed with the second one. Especially from you. Well, I kind of saw it coming my way. Maybe. I should have.

I had been so busy. Way too busy. I had been busy since graduation. And it was only getting worse after years. Especially since I got promoted as senior producer at the label. And yeah. I admitted it. I was too busy.

I cancelled our dates repeatedly. I rarely went home to you. And most of the times, I even forgot to tell you. Forgot about having you. Forgot that you were waiting for me.

And Chloe... You were patient. You have always been.

And it comforted me. Made me feel safe. I took you for granted. Over and over again.

You have been patient. Well, had. Until then. Because at some point, that point, you got tired.

The rage and the anger you showed me that night was... beyond imagination. Boy, was I horrified.

It wasn't the words that scared me the most. It was seeing you with a suitcase at two in the morning in our living room after I came back from work. It drained the blood out of my veins. Knocked the wind out of my lungs.

And boy did it scared the life out of me. Now that I recall it, I think my heart skipped a beat. Maybe two. Or more.

"Chloe..." I said almost desperately. "Chloe... Wait."

"Wait?!" You yelled at me furiously. "Wait you say?! I have been waiting Beca! I waited for you for hours tonight at the restaurant! It's our anniversary for god's sake! And this is not the first or the second time!"

"Chlo-"

"No Becs!" You cut me off harshly as you wiped the tears on your cheeks. "I've waited! As a matter of fact, I've been waiting! On the sidelines! For years! Seeing you! Watching you getting busier and busier! Leaving me on my own in a place we call home! Letting me having this relationship alone!"

"Chloe..." I pleaded without even knowing that tears had already been running down my face. "Please..."

"I have no time in your day!" You kept on yelling, ignoring my pleading. "You! Have no room for me in your life!"

"Hold on Babe..." I begged you. I remember holding and clutching your hand tightly. So tight as if my life was depending on it. No. Not as if. My life depended on you. Depends on you. No. It's not right. My life is you.

I wouldn't have a life without you. I'd be an empty shell. With eyeliner too thick and ear monstrosities too many. I'd be an angry walking case. Hollowed. With no love nor life inside. Because that is how I used to be. Before you.

You tried so hard to pull your hand away from me. And I remember it clearly how painful my shoulder was when you yanked it away harshly. Pulling my hand with yours in the process. Because I didn't let go. I wouldn't let go. I couldn't... let go.

"Let me go!" You yelled. You were crying. And I knew that it wasn't a sad crying. It was the helpless-bottled-suppressed-been pushed over the edge-angry crying.

And I didn't blame you. I still don't. You were angry. Disappointed even. I knew it all along. I just brushed it off. I brushed off my conscience that had been telling me that I was treating you unfairly. I was loving you selfishly.

Believe me. I knew. Still do.

"Don't..." I sobbed. My throat was hurting. And I found it hard to speak up. But I had to. Before I lost my chance to tell you, to show you, just how badly I needed you in my life.

"Don't let go Chlo... Please..."

"I never did!" You snapped. Still with tears running down your face. "You made me do this! You don't need me!"

"It's not true!" I yelled back in crying. It wasn't my intention to yell at you. It's just... the lump in my throat was agonizing. And I had to yell to push it out. "It is so not fucking true!"

"What's not true?! You screamed out hysterically. "Tell me! That you rarely reply my texts?! My phone calls?! Or the fact that you are rarely at home! I'm with you and I'm feeling lonely! I'm alone, Becs!"

I swallowed hard. So hard that I thought I might had torn up my trachea. I tried to take a breather. It was ragged because I was sobbing. Hard.

"For years Becs!" You cried out. And I flinched as the memory of how I had let you down in so many ways for so many times flashed before my eyes.

You, waiting for me to come to the audition.

You, waiting for me to come back after semi.

You, waiting for me to come to my senses and kiss you after we won our first ICCA.

You, waiting for me to come back from the radio station.

You, waiting for me to come back from the internship.

You, waiting for me to come back from the studio.

You, waiting for me to come to our anniversary dinner dates.

You, waiting for me to text and call you back.

Basically you, simply waiting for me to come back home. To you.

I can keep going. I do. There were so many things that I didn't do right to you. I know.

"Years!" Your loud yelling brought me back to reality.

"I... I need you, Chlo..." I sobbed out between hiccups. Almost choking in my tears. "Mo-more th-than anything... Mo-more th-than the a-air I breathe..."

"Liar!" You yelled loudly. Still crying. Still sobbing. "You are a hotshot producer now! You are famous! You make ridiculously wonderful music! The world loves you! And you have it all! With or without me!"

I shook my head while holding my breath. Thinking about how insignificant I made you feel about yourself. While in fact, you were my muse. My inspirations. Still are.

"You don't need me in your life! You don't need my love! Not anymore! All you need is work! Not me!" You kept on yelling.

I was taken aback. Literally. My grip on your hand became loose. And you took that small window, that split of second, to pull your hand away.

I thought you'd leave. But instead of leaving, you sat on the couch. Sobbing with your shoulders shaking. Crying your eyes out with your face in your palms.

And for a second, I was relieved. For a second. A second that determined everything.

Then I took a seat on the other couch. Trying to compose myself. I wiped my tears away, tried to steady my breaths, and shook off the nerves out from my shaking hands.

For a long while, there were only your heart-wrenching sobbing and my sniffling. Then, for only God knew how long, eventually, they subsided. And there was nothing else in the air. The silent that used to be comforting, became threatening. So frightening.

It's not that I'm afraid of being on my own. Of being left. Of being alone.

No. I'm used to them. Dad left with another woman. Mom became a workaholic after dad left. Friends and family didn't care because a rebellious kid is still a rebellious kid no matter what your reason is. Dad left me out in the cold after I came out.

I was familiar. Close even. To loneliness. I've befriended my loneliness.

But that was before you. Before the activities fair. Before the harmonizing in the bathroom. Before you stood up for me in front of The Bellas.

That was the old me. Before you. Before you replaced its role as my best friend. Then my lover.

After you, I was afraid of being alone. Of feeling lonely. Of living in loneliness. You, made me scared of my old friend. My loneliness.

But on that night? I wasn't feeling afraid of being alone. Or lonely. No.

I dreaded... So, so, terrified... That I couldn't live without you. It became my biggest fear. To live without you. After you, I'd never even think about the possibility of living my life, this life, without you in it. It just never crossed my mind. Ever. Until then.

And just like that, everything was clear to me. Crystal clear. As why the sky is blue and why we can only see the stars at night even though we know that it's always there, up in the sky.

Suddenly, I knew what I had to do. No. Not suddenly. I was reminded. Just as we were reminded that the stars are in the sky only after the darkness of night appears.

Then I walked to you. I knelt in front of you and put my hands on your thighs. And did it almost kill me when you pushed them away. But I took another breath. I had to take a breath. I needed to.

"Chlo..." I started with shaky voice. "You... you said that I don't have time for you in my life... It's not true. You... are my life. As long as I have you, then my time will be always ticking... _You,_ are the constant ticking that make the time in my life keep going."

You shook your head, closing your dazzling blue eyes, pressing your trembling lips tightly. But I grabbed your cheeks and held it tight.

"Ju-just listen. Okay?"

You didn't say anything in return. But you stopped shaking your head. And I took it as a confirmation to go on.

"You... are the air I breathe." I continued. A little bit shaky. But not because I was uncertain. I was emotional. Pouring out my feelings in words; my truest, deepest, and most vulnerable feelings out in the open had always been the hardest thing to do in my life.

And you, make me feel vulnerable. You, make me feel exposed. Easily hurt. You have that effect on me.

You know it.

Honestly, being vulnerable... It has never been and will never be my strongest suit. Ever. Not even a bit more than I have always been.

That, you do know too.

But I've learnt to live with this vulnerability since a very long time ago. For you. With you.

You also know it.

I have to. Because I love you.

You clearly know that. Maybe.

"I can only become who I am... Do everything I'm doing... Get everything I want... Because I have you. You bring out the best of me... You always have. And I am so, so sorry for taking you for granted. I really, really am." I said honestly. Helplessly.

And you didn't say anything. Or do anything. You couldn't even look at me. But I couldn't stop. I shouldn't stop. Even though your reaction had chipped out my courage bit by bit. I wouldn't... stop.

I took a long ragged breath and said, "I-I know that the ground is shaking... Our ground... is shaking. I know Chlo. And I am the one to blame for that. I know that too. But please... please hold on tight Babe... Please... Ju-just for the love we have. For the love we're making... Please hold on to me. One more time."

"Bec-" I knew you wanted to argue. You wanted to tell me that you've had enough. So I cut you off.

I said, "You are the one for me, Chlo. Not my job... Not those songs... Not the fans... Not anything else... You."

You let out a damp scoff and said, "You sure about that? I thought you had married your job."

And I chuckled. I did. Because not only that the concept of me marrying a job is ridiculous. The thought of me marrying anything or anybody else but you is ridiculous.

You stared at me in confusion. Maybe you thought I had gone crazy. Maybe I had.

"See..." I said with a soft smile. I knew my eyes were showing sadness. But my lips? They were smiling. Faintly. But a smile nevertheless. "You are the one who can make me laugh. Even when I want to cry."

Then, you were the one who chuckle. And boy did it flutter my chest. Even after all these years. Your smile is still the best thing that I long for. I crave for. I live for. I'd die for.

"You were right. We got a good thing, Chlo." I said. And I could even feel the fondness in my voice. "Not perfect. I know. Far from perfect. Indeed."

"I know..." You said in barely a whisper. "I know Becs... But we don't need perfect. I don't want perfect. I needed you. I wanted you."

And just by that, I couldn't help the hopeful smile to appear on my face. My sticky teary face. Cautiously, I took your hands in mine. Both of them. And I held them tight. Kissed them dearly. And you let me.

"Marry me Chlo." I said calmly. "Marry me."

I could see your eyes widened. Maybe it was in surprise. Maybe it was in fear. Maybe it was in shock. I didn't know.

But I understood. Whatever it was, I understood. After eight years of dating, I finally had enough courage to ask _The_ Chloe Beale to marry me.

For the record, I had asked your dad's permission on our graduation day though. And we had only been dating for three years back then. But somehow I was sure. You are the one for me. You have always been. And I have always been sure. Too sure.

So yeah. I understood your reaction. And forgive me. I'm sorry if I had to propose on the night when you were so furious at me. Because for the first time ever, I was scared of you leaving me. Dreading that the only thing that I thought would always stay with me will walk away.

"Your dad already gave his okay years ago." I added. Still as calm as before. Because it was my conscience talking. Not my emotion. Not my fear. I knew it. I was sure of it. Still am. "Five years ago. I asked him. And he said yes. As long as you'll have me."

You remained silent. And it was agonizing. The waiting for your reaction, answer, or anything that indicated that you were still breathing were coming painstakingly slow for me. Minutes had passed, yet nothing had passed your lips yet.

I remember how I closed my eyes and took a deep defeated breath. Thinking, certain, that you couldn't find the way to say yes. That you would say no. That you were out of your depth of loving me. Out of reasons. For staying with me. And I only had myself to blame for that.

So, like I said in the beginning, I can't ever let go of this memory. It's stuck in my brain. With the strongest intact synapses. It is my lesson. My biggest, most valuable lesson. My constant reminder. To never take anything for granted. Especially when it comes from someone who love me the most. Never again. I won't make the same mistake like I did to you for years.

Then a pair of arms wrapping me from behind pull me back to this moment. To the side of the ocean. To where I am. And it stops my train of thinking.

I smiled though. Not annoyed, not even slightly disturbed. I smiled.

I don't need to turn around to know who is the owner of the arms. I can feel a kiss on my shoulder though. And I close my eyes. Letting myself feeling the contented feeling from the simplest touch a human being can do to me. One particular human being.

It has already been three years after that night. It was by far the most terrifying moment in my life. So far. And your voice, answering my question that night comes into my mind. Right there and then. As clear as the day. As if you are saying it now.

"Yes..." You said in barely a whisper.

And my eyes shot opened. I thought I was hearing things. I believed I heard wrong. Even though the fond smile on your face told me the otherwise. I wanted to be sure. I had to be sure.

"Yes?" I asked carefully. Afraid that it was only in my imagination.

"Yes." You said. Smiling with teary eyes on your teary face.

"Hah..." I let out a relieved damp sigh through my mouth. I kissed your forehead. The tip of your nose. Your cheeks. Your eyelids. Your lips. I kissed them all. And then I rested my forehead on yours. I think I had never been so relieved in my whole life.

"But you can't do that to me anymore, Becs." You said softly.

I nodded.

"You can't leave me alone in our home again." You added. Still with the same soft voice.

I nodded again.

"You can't make me feel lonely anymore." I can hear the vulnerability in your voice.

And for the third time, I gladly nodded. Again.

"Not after you promise a happily ever after to me. Not after I agree to have that happily ever after with you."

"I promise." I replied softly. Not only to you. But also to myself. I would never, ever, ever, take you for granted again. Not a chance. Not anymore.

So here we are. Three years after that night. Still together. It took you a while after saying yes. You needed to be sure. You wanted to see a change. It took me a while too. To change. And then you have it. The revised version of me. The better me. The one that you deserve. Because that's what you do to me. You bring out the best out of me. For you. And us.

I smile and turn around to look at you. You move your hands from my back up to my shoulders, and I put my hands on your waist.

And I then I look at you. Closely. Clearly.

You with your radiant red hair.

You with your beaming smile.

You with your brightest blue eyes, glimmering under the orange sky. And damn it, can it be more mesmerizing.

You are giving me that smile. The smile that's reserved only for me. Appeared only by seeing me.

You, Chloe Beale, are my lucky star. And not only because I think so. But also because everybody seem to see it too. That's what they keep telling me.

 _You are lucky Beca._

And yes. I believe them. It's true. I couldn't be more agree. I am so fucking lucky. I don't know how or why you stay. Heck, I didn't even know how or why you fell in love with me in the first place. So yeah. Having you makes me the luckiest person alive.

Because dead people don't get lucky.

Ugh! Not the point! Damn it, Beca Mitchell! What the fuck is wrong with you and your easily distracted inappropriate mind in the most unsuitable time?!

Deep breath... Where was I?

Oh. Being the luckiest person alive.

Yeah. It's true. It's how I feel.

Compared to the other seven billions human being, I get to be the luckiest one. Because I am loved. By you.

"Why are you letting me alone today?" You protest with a pout.

I chuckle before I kiss the pout away.

"I was thinking about the night I proposed." I say softly.

You simply smile.

Then Jesse comes to us and says, "Hey Mrs. Mitchell. Can I borrow your other half?"

He is talking to you. Not me. Because you have become Mrs. Mitchell since... let me check my watch.

Ah. Two hours and twenty-three minutes ago.

"Sure." You say cheerfully before you kiss me chastely on my lips and walks toward Aubrey. Leaving me in a haze of the trace of your lips on mine. Staring at your back with a soft smile on my face.

I can hear Jesse is chuckling before he says, "You are very lucky, dude."

"Indeed." I tell him.

"Guess you have to send your dad a thank you card at least." Jesse teases me. He knows that after I came out as gay, my so-called father banned me from his family.

I snort and say, "I owe him that much for pushing me to go to Barden. I guess. I'll make sure to find a car that says _Thank you Dad. For college. From the daughter you disowned years ago. For being gay. With Chloe. Ps. We're married._ "

Jesse bursts out the wine he's sipping through his nose, choking and coughing before he scolds, "Damn you, Beca!"

I simply laugh and smack his back repeatedly.

After the laughter unwind, I just can't help myself and staring at you.

I can see that you are stealing glances at me while trying to listen to Aubrey all at the same time. And I wink at you. Then you give me that smile. Your beaming smile. Your beaming smile that worth a whole lot more than every penny in this whole universe.

Then I turn around to look back at the ocean. Yep. Ocean. Cliché. Too way out of my taste. But it's your dream since you were only six. To have a wedding by the shore. At sunset. And who am I to deny you the one thing you've been dreaming of almost your whole life?

So I said yes. Instantly. Without hesitation.

Of course I agreed. That is the least I can do for you. For your patient love. For letting me loving you selfishly for years. For everything and anything you've been through for loving me.

I can feel Jesse's presence beside me.

"How are you feeling?" He ask. "It's your wedding day. Must be something wonderful, right?"

I sigh contentedly before I reply, "It still feels surreal somehow, Jess. To me at least. I found her... what? Eleven years ago. And look at us now. Having our happily ever after. I mean, you know how I was back in college. And after every shitty crappy stuff I pulled for years, after all these times, who would have thought, right?"

"Don't feel too safe though." Jesse says softly. "There will be ups and downs, Beca."

"I know." I say calmly. "But as long as I have her arms wrap around me, I'll be fine, Jess. I know it."

"Good for you." He says. And I can feel his eyes on me. "Just don't take her for granted."

"I won't. Ever again."

"You have a good thing, Beca."

It takes me a while, taking in the feeling those words bring, letting them sink into every cells of my being before I reply, "I got a good thing, Jess."

"Yep." He adds certainly. "And when you got a good thing-"

"You hold on to it." I finish his sentence. "Tight. You don't let go."


End file.
